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Let’s Gayly Oogle Voldo Together

September 24, 2009 in characters by Sam Saturday | No comments

Fighting game Soul Calibur: Broken Destiny is out on the PSP now. I don’t have a PSP, so I can’t play it. But even if I could, I wouldn’t want to. Because, you see, this entry in the Soul Calibur franchise is missing one important factor. And his name is…….VOLDO!!!!

Eye say! Hahahahaha!

Yes, one of the gayest video game characters ever created has been deleted from the latest installment of the long-running series. I don’t know who at Namco is responsible for this embarrassing and likely-homophobic oversight, but by golly, they’ll pay for it in the afterlife!

In honor of our gone-but-not-forgotten S&M hero, let’s take a look at a few images of him in all his glory.

Tags: ass, codpiece, gentlemen, insanity, legs, namco, soul calibur, voldo

Unboxing: Check Out My Stick

September 11, 2009 in Retail by Sam Saturday | 1 comment

Street Fighter IV - Femme Fatale FightStick My limited edition MadCatz Street Fighter IV “Femme Fatale” Tournament Edition Arcade FightStick arrived the other day. Check out this lovely video of me opening the box. Bonus: An adorable kitten takes part!

Tags: ass, cammy, capcom, chun li, ladies, madcatz, street fighter, unboxing, xbox 360

Motherfucker! This Stick Is Hotter Than My Stick!

August 31, 2009 in Retail by Sam Saturday | No comments

Capcom, you assholes! I can’t believe you tricked me into buying the Comic-Con-exclusive version of your Street Fighter IV FightStick when you knew you’d have a hotter “Femme Fatale” version at the Penny Arcade Expo! Just look at this foxy thing!

Street Fighter IV - Femme Fatale FightStick

Seriously, dudes, what the fuck? Not only does the design feature Crimson Viper’s tits, Sakura’s legs and Cammy’s ass, but it’s bordered in purple, my favorite color. The fiends!

Kotaku is reporting that these sticks won’t just be available at PAX, but you’ll also be able to buy them online. I guess I have no choice; now I have to buy a second stick!

For comparison, here’s the Comic-Con version:

Street Fighter IV - Comic-Con FightStick

And I was happy with this thing until I saw the sexy one. Fuckers!

Tags: ass, cammy, chun li, comic-con, crimson viper, legs, PAX, street fighter, tits, tournament stick, xbox 360

Mass Effect 2: Strippers In Spaaaace!!!

August 19, 2009 in Sex in Games by Sam Saturday | 1 comment

I’m not sure what this trailer’s all about since I didn’t play the first game. But who cares because, dude, it has alien pole dancers. ALIEN POLE DANCERS. See for yourself!

And scifi nerds everywhere jizz themselves.

Tags: ass, bioware, mass effect 2, PC, xbox 360

Touchy Touchy, Love Plus!

August 5, 2009 in Cheap Thrills by Sam Saturday | 1 comment

From Japan, the land of romance, comes the latest in the Doki Majo girl-touching series: Doki Majo Plus! Check out the marvelous and near-incomprehensible trailer.

Yes, that right. Bend over a little more, baby...

Yes, that right. Don't be nervous. Just bend over a little more, baby...

I’ve read that there’s little-to-no chance this game will ever be released outside of Japan. But man! If only we could have some DS girl-examination games here. If only…

And while I’m on the subject, seriously, why is it okay for these kinds of games to be available in Japan but not in the West? Yes, I know there are “cultural differences” and blah blah blah. But really, are we THAT repressed that game publishers won’t even consider releasing cheeky games here? The U.S. of A. needs a publisher that’s willing to take a chance on this kind of stuff. Sure, we have the hentai games, but what about games like these, which are just naughty fun? Some publisher out there needs to stuff up to the challenge!

Tags: ass, doki majo, insanity, ladies, tits, trailer

Hey Hustler, Thanks For The Porn!

July 30, 2009 in Porn by Sam Saturday | No comments

Last night was the Hustler Freedomfest at the Whiskey A Go Go on the Sunset Strip. The event was to benefit the Free Speech Coalition. I got to meet some of the big names in adult entertainment and I took home lots of free porn and sex toys! Here are a few shots from the night.